Thread:ChiisaiAoi/@comment-218.186.15.10-20130703182909/@comment-5714639-20130724063218

I've read it...

I am at a loss myself. Although you let them use your laptop, I doubt you knew what would happen, so we are both victims of this person.

At the same time, the threats and the anger scared and stressed me out a lot. It probably doesn't help that I have anxiety and take medication for it. Even now, despite having already taken my medication and its side effects are still making me sleepy, I am trembling and scared to sleep for fear of having nightmares about some person committing suicide because of something I wrote online. My eyes feel heavy and yet I don't want them to close - my body is both tired but too anxious to let me unwind, so I'm tense and unable to sleep. Although I want to, I'm scared to sleep.

I honestly don't know what to do. It was a very scary experience to have to deal with. Threatening suicide should never be done or taken lightly, especially if someone will be blaming someone else for causing it. The person who used your laptop was disturbing to deal with - I've never encountered such vehemence on the internet in my life, let alone directed at me. I think I might cry - I feel like crying, - but I don't know if I can and I don't know why I want to. I just know that there are tears trying to blur my eyes but never last long enough to fall.

It's good to know the person has been hospitalized, but that doesn't help the anxiety that plagues me, giving me all kinds of strange thoughts, like "What if they commit suicide while institutionalized? It might be all my fault." Even though I know for a fact that such an occurrance would be unlikely, my anxiety still haunts me with the possibility that it might occur.

I'm sorry. I know this must be stressful for you, but at the moment I just need to figure out what to do for myself... Besides, my thought process is probably not completely reliable at the moment - exhaustion, anxiety, stress, - doesn't make for good reasoning or a forgiving attitude, so if I come across as rude in any way, I'm sorry.

Thank you for explaining the situation. I hope you find a way to solve this problem for everyone's sake, including your own. It will save everyone involved a lot of stress in the future.